SGTLEO;

I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH. AS I LOST MY WIFE

2 1/2 YRS AGO. MY PRAYERS GO WITH YOU AND YOUR WIFE. Rocky

Hi Sgt Leo, so sorry to hear about your dear wife's condition. It is never easy to see a loved one ill.

lots of hugs to you both,

Brooke

Hello Sgt. Leo,

My prayers are with you and your dear wife.

God Bless both of you.

Jim

Dear sgtLeo: I wanted to let you know how my heart aches for you.

My best to your dear wife.

You have my thoughts and prayers, too sgtLeo.

Many Hugs,

Vee

Dear Sarge:

Exasperating n'est pas? You take your dear wife for care, and she doesn't get it? What is wrong with that scenario.

I know you will appreciate this story, and I can see you shaking your head already.

Last year we moved Lee's mother from an assisted living facility down state to one closer to us up north. That facility was great, and had two levels of care; basic assisted living with your own apartments (or shared), then the advanced care for severe cases of dementia etc. Lee's mom's Alzheimers was advancing, and she would need more care than when she initially moved into the facility. But, we didn't want her to remain there for two reasons - 1)Several of us were now living up north, and 2)The cost of moving her from one level to the next level was astounding. It was going to wind up being almost 8,000.00 per month! OUCH!

So we looked around near us and finally found a place very close, which was suitable and would offer full-time assistance. Long story short; she is still there, but we almost had to find another facility. WHY? Because one of the health care professionals informed us that mom slapped someone, and they didn't deal with that kind of behavior. Told us we may have to move her to a different care center! WHAT???

This place handles full-blown alz and dementia patients. We toured the facility, talked with various care-takers, etc., etc., then we are told this. We were furious as you can well imagine. Of course we set up a meeting and told them what the one gal had stated to us. We said mom would not be moved again, and she was remaining with them until the end. Explained that mom had never done anything like that before, but heck she has Alz and you never know what they will do from one day to the next. Hey deal with it; ain't that supposed to be what you do? We were frustrated.

In the long run it worked out for us, but there were several weeks of touch and go. Utter stupidity!

My thoughts and prayers are with you as always. I wish I could fly down and assist, but alas I cannot. So instead I send my love and many hugs your way.

To one and all:-

"Thanks I needed that response".

Top(SgtLeo)

I think many of these "assisted living" places are just out to make $$$.

Also - though there are a great many excellent caregivers, there are also alot who have NO COMMON SENSE and NO DISCERNMENT!

When my Aunt had a brain tumor, I had both hospice & private nursing for her in her home and drove to RI every few days to chk on her.

She had trouble "word finding" because of the tumor and one night she called me & said: "It's not right, Mary. It's not right". I panicked & drove down & called a meeting with Hospice. The coordinator told me my Aunt couldn't have Hospice anymore because she wasn't letting them in the house. I told them "Listen people, my dear Aunt may be 85 with a brain tumor, but I guarantee you she can still out think the lot of us put together. If you folks are coming to her door and not showing some kind of ID - she is NOT gonna let you in. Would

YOU if you were in her place?" That straightened the problem out, but couldn't they have figured it out themselves??

SgtLeo,

I don't know if this will help, but my cousin is in a nursing facility in Stoughton that is fabulous. The staff there has been outstanding and the place is beautiful - like a 5 star hotel. The whole family has been incredibly impressed by their care & kindness. Here's the link in case it may be a help for

you:

http://www.copley-nh.com/

Now, I am right close by in Needham - if there's any grocery shopping or errands I can do, please just say the word. It'd be a privilege.

mary ann

Marion et alia:-

This is one incident that I was involved in at the Assisted Living facility my wife and I were in.

Unfortunately, my wife got her "walker" caught in a bathroom rug as she prepared to shower and took a spill. There are 2 nurses and an LPN there but they CANNOT engage in any "skilled nursing". Fortunately my wife was not seriously hurt but did get a cut on her arm. The LPN put a Band-Aid and some bacetracin on her cut while we waited for the EMT people to take her to the hospital to xray her head on which she had a lump.

When the EMTs arrived, the LPN gave them a dissertation about how she had "medically dressed" my wife's arm to save them time. One of the EMTs who was visibly upset with the LPN said "Lady I can see that you put a Band-Aid and bacetracin on her arm but that is all you did. If you knew what "dressing a wound was - you would know that it is much more complicated than that. Please get out of our way".

Later I talked with the EMT and he told me that they call people like that LPN -People who Like to Play Nurse.

From that day until the day we left, the LPN avoided me like the plague but was NOT smart enough to keep her pie hole shut. She decided to tell the Private Nurses we had the Chapter and the verse of the incident. I have heard from several other agencies dripping with sarcasm of her "Dressing of the Wound". I never mentioned the incident but she opened her mouth to brag and inserted both feet.

Top(Sgtleo)

That EMT should get an award. When a Visiting Nurse removed the staples after my mother's triple bypass, she neglected to put anything on the largest open portion of her leg incision & consequently it opened further and began to bleed heavily. I called the Visiting Nurse (as I'd been instructed to do if we had a problem) , she acted perplexed about what to do and told me she had no supplies - no bandaids, no steri-strips. HUH? A nurse who doesn't have medical supplies - pretty useless. Needless to say, I applied pressure, cut up some bandaids & that worked.

I'm always wary of so called "help" that's supposedly out there from councils, church groups, organizations, and especially GOVERNMENT funded bureaucracies. Most are like that LPN playing Nurse. No help at all.

I'll tell you I saw saw some real crappy healthcare professionals while my grandpa was sick. I can count on one hand the people who were professional and treated my grandpa and us well. That includes doctors, nurses, aides, paramedics, etc.

If you don't think they're taking good care of your loved one don't hesitate to chew their ass and go to a supervisor.

Sarge, even with all this going on, you still have the skill to make me laugh. That is what I love about cha! LPN, Likes Playing Nurse. That is a hoot!

But alas, that is often the truth.

We all shake our heads in wonderment. Why on God's earth should we pay money for care such as this? Should I call it care? I think not. Let's call it careless.

They say they can't do this and they can't do that. But yet, it is okay to send a loved one home with someone with no doctor or nursing skills? Does this make sense?